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Pop culture dispatches from the Great Lakes

Texas A&M Aggies

Addison Recorder Football Pick ‘Em: Week Six

October 2, 2014 by Alex Bean Leave a Comment
Jim Delany Adam Rittenberg The Darkness

WELCOME TO THE DARKNESS

Welcome to the Addison Recorder‘s football Pick ‘Em column. Each week Alex and a guest writer will predict the outcome of the most intriguing games on the slate. He will try to be as expert as possible, but we make no guarantees for his guests.

Wet Dog Hannibal gif

Wet dog = victorious cat. LOGIC

#19 Nebraska @ #10 MSU

Bean:

At the top of this article is Big Ten commissioner Jim Delany being interviewed by ESPN. Look into his eyes. They see nothing. There is no future. The past is only pain. Delany is only in the present and the present is The Darkness. Everything is The Darkness. This week’s picks from Alex are inspired by The Darkness. They will be expressed via gifs & images from The Darkness’s favorite TV show: Hannibal. All gifs via Tumblr.

To wit, this is a game between Nebraska, who are lead by Bo Pellini’s cat, and a bunch of faux-Spartans who are the best and most morally defensible football team in the state of Michigan right now. THE CAT SHALL TRIUMPH BY 5. [Read more…]

Posted in: Football, Pick ' EM, Sports Tagged: Alabama Crimson Tide, Michigan State Spartans, Michigan Wolverines, Mississippi State Bulldogs, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, Ole Miss Rebels, Seattle Seahawks, Stanford Cardinal, Texas A&M Aggies, The Washington NFL Team

Addison Recorder Football Pick ‘Em: Week Three

September 11, 2014 by Alex Bean Leave a Comment

Welcome to the Addison Recorder‘s football Pick ‘Em column. Each week Alex and a guest writer will predict the outcome of the most intriguing games on the slate. He will try to be as expert as possible, but we make no guarantees for his guests.

Kyle Field Texas A&M

This is almost certainly Chris’s idea of home. (Image via)

Rice Owls at #7 Texas A&M Aggies

Going solo this week because the match-ups sort of suck. Also, let me just say that last week sucked and let’s never talk about it again.  (Editor’s note – when I win in a head-to-head football pick ’em with Bean, you know how incredibly and improbably such a week sucked in the grand scheme of things, because I have no business getting so much football right. – Andrew) Moving on, we’ve got this pick leading off in honor of next week’s guest-picker: our very own Texas A&M alum and lifelong Aggie fanatic, Chris Walsh. He can hardly stand a day in which we don’t talk about the glory that is A&M football and/or Johnny Manziel, so it’s only fair. In real life, this game will not be a contest. A&M started the season by blowing the doors off of South Carolina in a game I predicted very incorrectly. They will do worse things to a Rice team that has nowhere near their talent level. It will get ugly. Chris will watch every glorious second while whispering “Gig ‘Em.” Aggies by the square root of all the cattle in Texas. [Read more…]

Posted in: Football, Pick ' EM, Sports Tagged: Baltimore Ravens, Chicago Bears, Georgia Bulldogs, Pittsburgh Steelers, Rice Owls, Roger Goodell, San Francisco 49ers, South Carolina Gamecocks, Texas A&M Aggies, Texas Longhorns, UCLA Bruins

Addison Recorder Football Pick ‘Em: Week One

August 28, 2014 by Alex Bean Leave a Comment

Welcome to The Addison Recorder’s football Pick ‘Em column. Each week Alex and a guest writer will predict the outcome of the most intriguing games on the slate. He will try to be as expert as possible, but we make no guarantees for his guests.

Appalachian State at Michigan

Appalachian State Michigan Upset 2007 WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY

WHY THE FUCK ARE WE BRINGING THIS UP AGAIN?! (Image via.)

Bean: Fuck this game. I hate Michigan’s AD, Dave Brandon, for scheduling it. I’m sure he did it because it will draw interest in a cheap way (his reason to exist, apparently) and could exorcise the ghost of The Horror. But it won’t. All it does is bring up memories of that fiasco and even if Michigan wins in 2014 they cannot erase the loss from 2007. Not ever. Playing this game is so stupid I want to explode. Michigan will win, because ASU isn’t as good as they were in ’07. But neither is Michigan. <sighs angrily all day> Wolverines by at least 20 points.

Travis: This game is the best thing since sliced bread. This game invented the wheel. This game painted the Mona Lisa, with enough time left over to make creme brulees for the entire coaching staff and roster of App State. This game is a thing of beauty, a tribute to all that is good and right with the world. Also, Michigan is going to dominate. Wolverines by 21. [Read more…]

Posted in: Football, Sports Tagged: Appalachian State Mountaineers, Clemson Togers, Florida State Seminoles, Georgia Bulldogs, LSU Tigers, Michigan Wolverines, Oklahoma State Cowboys, South Carolina Gamecocks, Texas A&M Aggies, Wisconsin Badgers

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