What does it mean to be a “bad feminist”? Author Roxane Gay defines the term in the intro of her book of essays of the same title. She admits she may not be as up on feminist texts as she’d like and sometimes she finds herself singing along to pop music she knows is bad for women. But she also supports equal pay for equal work and a woman’s right to make decisions about her own health with unfettered access to health care. A “bad” feminist accepts that she or he cannot be a perfect ideal and example of feminism at all times.
When I was in college, I had few female friends — the ones I did have were not close, and more often than not they were the girfriends of my guy friends. I didn’t think much of it at the time, and possibly even prided myself on what I saw as passing as “one of the guys.” I wasn’t passing, and looking back now, I can see that while I was busy trying to be the cool girl surrounded by guys, I missed out on a lot by rejecting female bonds.